Backflip!
June 5th 2008 22:20
I want that one... no, wait... that one... no, wait...
Prince
In the mid nineties, this serial buffoon changed his name to "a bunch of stupid squiggly lines". Apparently this symbol represents Prince’s sexual attraction to himself. Quite sensibly, Mr Squiggle changed his name back to Prince when his nasty Warner Bros contract expired.
Shihad
Concerned that their non-existent American fan base may misinterpret their name as ‘jihad’, these flip-floppers changed their name to ‘Pacifier’. Then, concerned that their actually-existing fans were misinterpreting them as spineless twats, they changed their name back to Shihad.
Bob Dylan
In the late 1970s, this drug-addled hippie converted to Jesus and started releasing god-awful evangelical albums. Then, in the 1980s, Dylan decided that he wasn’t really a Christian after all, and reverted to releasing god-awful drug-addled hippie albums.
Kiss
Kiss rose to fame singing impossibly bad songs in impossibly bad make-up. Then, acting on impossibly bad advice, Kiss decided to perform without make-up. On discovering that without make-up they were just douche bags, Kiss reverted to performing in make-up.
Kiss Again
Just before the turn of the century, Kiss announced that they were no more. Then, just before the turn of the century, Kiss announced what would be their Reunion Tour. Then, just after the turn of the century, Kiss announced what would be their Farewell Tour. Then, just after the turn of the century, Kiss announced what would be their Reunion Tour.
Kylie
In the mid nineties, pop princess Kylie Minogue decided that she might become indie. She even performed at the Big Day Out. Then, when she realised she was not really that alternative after all, she decided not to be indie anymore. And the Princess lived happily ever after!
Billy Corgan
Billy dissolved his celebrated rock band, The Smashing Pumpkins, in favour of launching the less celebrated band, Zwan. Then, Billy decided he might sweep Zwan under the carpet and start selling Smashing Pumpkins again. Headline prediction:
“Smashing Pumpkins grow tired of Billy Corgan’s whining:
Billy announces Zwan reunion”.
And, finally...
MC Hammer, who has apparently made a solid return to not being famous.
Prince
In the mid nineties, this serial buffoon changed his name to "a bunch of stupid squiggly lines". Apparently this symbol represents Prince’s sexual attraction to himself. Quite sensibly, Mr Squiggle changed his name back to Prince when his nasty Warner Bros contract expired.
Shihad
Concerned that their non-existent American fan base may misinterpret their name as ‘jihad’, these flip-floppers changed their name to ‘Pacifier’. Then, concerned that their actually-existing fans were misinterpreting them as spineless twats, they changed their name back to Shihad.
Bob Dylan
Bob Dylan, circa 1978
In the late 1970s, this drug-addled hippie converted to Jesus and started releasing god-awful evangelical albums. Then, in the 1980s, Dylan decided that he wasn’t really a Christian after all, and reverted to releasing god-awful drug-addled hippie albums.
Kiss
Kiss rose to fame singing impossibly bad songs in impossibly bad make-up. Then, acting on impossibly bad advice, Kiss decided to perform without make-up. On discovering that without make-up they were just douche bags, Kiss reverted to performing in make-up.
Kiss Again
Just before the turn of the century, Kiss announced that they were no more. Then, just before the turn of the century, Kiss announced what would be their Reunion Tour. Then, just after the turn of the century, Kiss announced what would be their Farewell Tour. Then, just after the turn of the century, Kiss announced what would be their Reunion Tour.
Kylie
In the mid nineties, pop princess Kylie Minogue decided that she might become indie. She even performed at the Big Day Out. Then, when she realised she was not really that alternative after all, she decided not to be indie anymore. And the Princess lived happily ever after!
Billy Corgan
That guy from Smashing Pumpkins with some other guys or something
Billy dissolved his celebrated rock band, The Smashing Pumpkins, in favour of launching the less celebrated band, Zwan. Then, Billy decided he might sweep Zwan under the carpet and start selling Smashing Pumpkins again. Headline prediction:
“Smashing Pumpkins grow tired of Billy Corgan’s whining:
Billy announces Zwan reunion”.
And, finally...
MC Hammer, who has apparently made a solid return to not being famous.
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