A Peak Inside the Inbox of the Rolling Stones
May 29th 2008 01:22
“Dear Sir Mick,
First, I would like to thank both you and Keith for offering me sympathy during this difficult time. Eternal damnation is never easy to contemplate, and it’s nice to have someone in my corner. Cheers!”
Prince of Darkness, Atlanta
“Wow! Your concert was so awesome! So many memories flooded back when I heard ‘Satisfaction’ (a 60s classic), ‘Jumpin Jack Flash’ (a 60s classic), ‘Brown Sugar’ (a 60s classic), ‘Sympathy for the Devil’ (a 60s classic), ‘You Can’t Always Get What You Want’ (a 60s classic) and so forth as well as some of my favourites such as ‘Rocks Off’, ‘Shine a Light’, ‘Tumbling Dice’ and more from ‘Exile on Main St’ (which was, if I recall correctly, written and recorded during the early 1970s AND late 1960s).”
“My dog just did the loudest turd, and it sounded EXACTLY like your last 30 years of recording output! Kooky, huh?”
Trevor, Wagga Wagga
“Ronnie Wood, man, you’re an inspiration to public servants everywhere. Never lose sight of what you set out not to achieve. If you got this far without any talent, why change the winning formula now?”
Peter, Canberra
“Hi Keith! I know it could be argued that you don’t care about making any more good music because you could die at any moment anyway. That would, of course, be a slightly funny argument but probably not a very helpful one.”
Little known fact: this guy has written as many hit songs as guitar legend Ronnie Woods
“I never get tired of hearing Bridges to Babylon! That album is gold!”
Jesus, Heaven
“Greencards! Penis enlargement! Cheap Viagra to winner!”
Dr Julius, Lagos
“It is of the greatest imperative that we conduct this transaction of US$1.35 million both with swiftness and the confidentiality I have come to expect from you. Please reconfirm your personal details to proceed.”
John David, Your trusted friend in best of faith, World Bank, Geneva
“Ha ha!”
Nelson, Springfield
You have nothing more.
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